This is almost too much power for a single person to wield. But I’ll take it.
To my shock and awe I have just realized that I am in the wrong profession. I should be running an extortion ring.
I went to the wish registry at Adora, picked out the presents I wanted, sent out the postcards to selected targets, and voila.
It worked. My friend gave me the Ray-Ban Colorized Wayfarers I had coveted but would not think of buying for myself because I am a vintage eyeglass frames-thrift shop-flea market snob. I have always known the power of emotional blackmail—my cats use it to control me—but this could have long-term effects on my weltanschauung (Avarice sounds more palatable in conjunction with something Teutonic).
Of course we know from fairy tales that wishes are fraught with complications and plot twists, so we have composed these ground rules for registering your wishes.
1. Only make your wishes known—that is, extort—from the people who know you well enough to appreciate the humor/irony of the situation.
2. Only extort from those who love you and find your acquisitiveness amusing because they know it does not define you.
3. Only extort from those you love because you are giving them the right to extort from you. When it’s your turn to grant their wishes you will want to do so freely and happily and not just because you owe them something. (Tit for tat is so bourgeois.)
And don’t forget to encourage your friends to put their wishes out there because you never know what’ll happen.
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
