The Rite of Spring: Housecleaning
My druid trained me to regard the vernal equinox as the beginning of a new cycle. I spent the last day of the old cycle doing something my druid would approve of: housecleaning.
Begin longish intro. I had the same cleaner for more than a decade. He would come in every Sunday afternoon to dust, scrub, and try to keep the cat fur to oxygen ratio down to a manageable (“breathing still possible”) level. The cleaner was a trustworthy little old guy, he knew where everything was, and the cats liked him. (Other people they ignore pointedly, still others they run away from screaming, “The Uruks have come! Muster the Rohirrim!”) Unfortunately he’s had a run of bad luck and had to move to Cavite with his family. It didn’t make sense for him to commute for hours just to clean my house on Sundays. So he quit and it was sad as hell because he probably regards me as an inept child with no domestic skills.
My sister, who if the word existed would be called ept, said their laundrywoman could be the new cleaner. She is also trustworthy, and the cats seemed to approve of her. She’d done some jail time, but it was because she pulled a knife on an abusive boyfriend. You can’t blame her for that. (Reminds me of a conversation I had with Bernard-Henri yesterday about a common friend—Martin Amis says this is the correct term, not “mutual friend”–who’d tried to rip him off on a project. We agreed that we could not hate common friend because he can’t help ripping people off, it’s his nature.) She came by the other Sunday to clean, but last Sunday she said she couldn’t make it, and then yesterday she didn’t appear. Clearly she doesn’t want the job. So I ended up doing spring cleaning.
Equinox: The sun from solstice to solstice, photo from NASA APOD.
It so happened that I was in my semi-annual cleaning frenzy mode. The other day I organized my closet and put away a bunch of clothes I haven’t worn in years and am not likely to wear again. I even found 4 or 5 outfits I’d forgotten I’d bought. Memo: If you have clothes you’ve never worn, you probably have enough clothes. The day before that I was at National Bookstore in Rockwell when I was reminded of all the prizes for the Weekly LitWit Challenges that have not been claimed by the winners. Customer Service’s shelves were about to burst from the stuff so I took back all the prizes that have not been claimed since December. (The very next day someone tried to claim his books. Sorry about that.)
And two days earlier I defrosted my refrigerator. Why I don’t defrost more often I have no idea–you only have to push a button. Instead I wait until the freezer is sealed shut by a thick coat of solid ice to push the blasted button. True, I don’t eat at home so my fridge contains coffee for the machine, cheese, a huge bottle of Chinese “champagne” that no one wants to try, and leftover restaurant meals that have sprouted new life forms. Getting the freezer open took 2 days.
Before yesterday’s housecleaning I surveyed the castle keep and decided that the problem is not dirt but clutter. As in stuff. Did I really need to keep the boxes of cameras, phones, gadgets I’ve had for years? Why do they still make phonebooks? Why did I save these empty gift packages? Sure they’re pretty, but I’m never going to recycle them, am I. They all went into two big trash bags. Memo: Don’t keep anything just because it’s cute. It won’t look so cute when it’s grimy. Throw it away. What project, you’re never going to make that assemblage. Throw! Now!
Then came the tedious part: sifting through boxes and bags of paper. Receipts from trips I took ten years ago–why do I still have these? Outdated city guides, fliers, museum floor plans, press kits for film festival entries, free magazines–Take One, the sign always says; from hereon say No!–stuff that has cluttered my house for years for no reason.
However I did find drafts of stories I’d forgotten I’d written, and clippings of articles I don’t remember writing. I’m like a factory of disposable prose. It’s a good thing I’ve never had a printer or I would’ve vanished under a sea of paper years ago (See the scene from Terry Gilliam’s Brazil).
Decluttering added at least three cubic meters of space to my house. After this Herculean labor cleaning the litter box was almost amusing (disgusting, but amusing). Happy New Year to you all.
March 21st, 2011 at 04:26
i’m encouraged by your efforts :) i hope i get my own spring cleaning done by end of april.
here in turkey, may 5 is hidrellez, the day on which the prophet hizir visits homes and blesses them BUT only if they’re clean…
one of last year’s hidrellez online advert:
http://www.mymerhaba.com/Hidrellez-Spring-Feast-in-Turkey-1775.html
March 21st, 2011 at 07:57
The bit about the cats’ relationship with your housecleaner reminded me of this story, which involves the Roomba vacuum-cleaning robot:
http://tomatonation.com/stories-true-and-otherwise/viva-la-roombalucion/
(Just found out that the Roomba remains unavailable in the Philippines, though.)
March 21st, 2011 at 10:38
yeah, you installed a camera in my apartment and you observe my life. how else could you describe my room so accurately?
March 21st, 2011 at 11:38
the minimalist rule: dispose things you haven’t used 6 mos up
March 21st, 2011 at 11:59
When my neighbor’s house caught fire I packed up all the things I thought I could not bear to lose. Original documents, expensive techie stuff, gadgets related to work, and my diaries just took up two backpacks and one shopping bag. As I sat on the corner of my street and watched fire trucks come and go, two things dawned on me: one, that I could actually get rid of all the other stuff in my house without much pain. I could carry my life around and simply start somewhere else. It felt very liberating. Two, thank God for e-books.
March 21st, 2011 at 12:23
When does one starts becoming a hoarder? Or are we just too lazy to declutter?
March 21st, 2011 at 14:23
Chores I loathe: laundry, ironing clothes and cleaning rooms. If it were up to me, I’d be wearing origami.
Cleaning rooms is another “argh” moment for me, although once I start it, I can’t seem to stop. I’d clean every nook and cranny of the house which irritates my brother and dad because they are not allowed to go to the areas where I’m cleaning, or else I cut their legs.
March 21st, 2011 at 15:14
You have just described my email inbox and outbox.