JessicaRulestheUniverse.com

Now, the question at hand.

Ex-Girlfriend, I will not endeavor to analyze your dreams. I am a die-hard Freud fan, and if we were to examine your dreams through the Freudian microscope, we will definitely arrive at the conclusion that you need to get some. Do you? If you do, I channel Brutus in HBO’s Rome when he told his mother Servilia: “This is untapped lust. We can get you a slave at the market and have it over with!” Not really an exact quote but you get the picture.

I think you have not yet gotten over your ex-boyfriends. I would have given you tips on how to rekindle the flame with them if they were not involved, but I don’t want you to be one of those people stalking their exes. It would be sad and a waste of time. Sure, the nights are colder and even my toes are freezing as I write but I am telling you that you have got to snap out of it. It’s been more than three years. Some people have gotten their master’s degrees in that period. It would be fine if you want to embody the spirit of Love in the Time of Cholera by waiting for their respective partners to drop dead then showing up at the funeral to declare your undying love while they are mourning.

People have different ways of getting over their past loves. I follow the Ibong Adarna philosophy. Don Juan avoided being lulled to sleep by the Adarna’s seven songs and being pooped on by cutting seven wounds on his arm and pouring the juice of a citrus fruit over them. Whenever fond memories of the person surface, I immediately summon memories of times that person hurt me. Works like a charm. You might have a different coping mechanism which you have yet to discover. The best thing for you to do now is to keep busy—take evening classes, enroll in a gym, get a hobby or watch marathons of TV series that you’ve missed. Engage in activities that would give you a sense that you are moving forward to something. Embark on a project. Do not overeat. Once you’ve become whole again, love and companionship will find you once more. Just take time to heal yourself and set yourself right. Nothing will change if you keep doing the same things.

Someone Like You by Adele, which a gay friend describes as, “Kanta ng baklang heartbroken dahil iniwanan ng boyfriend niya para magpakasal sa isang babae.”

I dissuade you from initiating any contact with them. Not while you are in your current state. You might sound like Adele in her song “Someone Like You” a part of which goes:

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn’t stay away, I couldn’t fight it.
I had hoped you’d see my face and that you’d be reminded
That for me it isn’t over

They have obviously moved on. You should, too.