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Here’s the correct schedule.

Gillian Anderson stars as Stella Gibson in The Fall

…that we wish she had.

Man fucks woman. Subject: man. Verb: fucks. Object: woman. That’s okay. Woman fucks man. Woman, subject. Man, object. That’s not so comfortable for you, is it.

Excellent acting, killer editing.

Clive James on The Fall.

There was something very familiar about the furor over Vice Ganda’s tasteless joke about Jessica Soho, but we couldn’t remember exactly what it was. Days later it hit us: We’d already written about it. Almost 20 years ago.

Vice Ganda thought it was all right to make a joke about rape because we live in a culture where rape is not a horrible crime but the stuff of entertainment and titillation.

From 1994, our column about “wag-wag”.

Read our column, Vice Ganda and what’s really sick about our society, at InterAksyon.com.

You cannot go wrong with spiked shoes. Not footwear for climbing, or 6-inch stilettos, but literal spiked shoes. In gold, so everyone can see them and stay away. Makes us feel like a Clegane. Where’s our cloak?

There are disadvantages to wearing these shoes. We’re clumsy, and occasionally trip over our own feet. When it happens in these shoes, the pain! So we have to walk with caution, but everyone else must tread carefully in our presence. You invade our personal space, you feel the consequences.

The Collector by John Fowles, Php595 at National Bookstores.

John Fowles’s first novel is a diary of obsessive love by a clerk who collects butterflies. It has a reputation for creepiness that we shall put to the test.

The novel was filmed in the 60s, starring Terence Stamp (Better known to us as General Zod). Mike de Leon’s Bilanggo Sa Dilim is also loosely based on the Fowles. (Does anyone have a copy?)

The Chemistry of Tears by Peter Carey, Php595 at National Bookstores.

We’ve always delighted in the novels of Peter Carey, but if we’d never read Oscar and Lucinda or The True History of the Kelly Gang, we would pick up The Chemistry of Tears on the basis of its opening paragraphs.

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Henry James really tests our patience (We’ve never gotten to the end of The Wings of the Dove, we keep hurling it across the room), but the present-day adaptation of What Maisie Knew starring Julianne Moore looks intriguing so we’ll give the novel a try. (It’s not as easy to hurl a laptop or tablet across the room.)

Playing with grammar is an easy way for advertising agencies to grab our attention. Rhetoricians call switching a word from one part of speech to another “anthimeria”. One particular way of doing it has caught the copywriters’ fancy. Virgin Atlantic is “flying in the face of ordinary”. Sky television in Britain invites you to “believe in better”. An Asus computer is the answer if you’re “in search of incredible”. Bergdorf Goodman, the luxury-goods store, is celebrating “111 years of extraordinary”. Yes, welcome to quirky. Welcome to edgy. Welcome to nounified.

Read Think Similar at More Intelligent Life.

And here’s a cat sending an urgent fax.

from Das Kraftfuttermischwerk