Got a question about sex? Ask our guest psychiatrist, Dr. Agnes Bueno
Therese dreaming by Balthus, 1938
Everybody thinks about sex; the question is, how often? Is it possible to think about sex too much? (What is “too much”?) Is it possible to not think about sex at all?
Around the time we declared independence from our parents and moved into a place of our own, we turned on the TV late one night and discovered the woman who has the answers. With her high intelligence and erudition, her direct manner, her colored contact lenses and decolletage, and her absolute refusal to treat sexuality as a subject “not suitable for polite company”, she helped to liberate us from our silly, giggly notions about love and relationships.
On Tuesday we’re doing a podcast with the famed psychiatrist and human sexuality expert, Dr. Agnes Bueno. We’re tackling everything you’ve always wanted to know about sex but didn’t know whom to ask (or were afraid to ask for fear of being judged and condemned as a maniac). So post your questions for Dr. Bueno in Comments, and we’ll try to cram them all into the podcast next week. Don’t be embarrassed; she won’t be.
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The 50 Shades of Grey books being devoid of literary value, does their use as masturbation helpers for the creatively-challenged justify their existence?
Could you recommend some good erotica?
Which fictional couples (from novels, movies and TV) would you say have healthy relationships?
Why do some people insist on staying in abusive relationships? Do they feel they deserve the abuse? Get their kicks from being abused?
Is Freud still relevant to the times?
Is monogamy natural and possible, or are people kidding ourselves?
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
October 23rd, 2013 at 10:41
Are there any pros and cons to having 1) too much, 2) too little, 3) no sex?
Thanks :D
October 23rd, 2013 at 11:04
Someone I know: “My significant other has fantasies of non-consensual sex or to put it plainly, rape paraphilia/fetish. This is already an iffy subject if the one carrying it is a guy. But my SO is a woman and the fetish scenario has her as the victim. Should I be concerned/worried?”
October 23rd, 2013 at 14:06
I read somewhere that a person’s psychological health would greatly improve if he has sex at least once a month.
If a person is not keen on having a relationship but enjoys sex very much, is it normal or acceptable to have another person to regularly do it with? Or is it preferable to be intimate with someone without engaging in sex?
October 23rd, 2013 at 21:51
Why do people get tired of their sexual partners? Any suggested solutions to this if one isnt into role play, kink or other kinds of stuff?
Is it really true that eating lots of papaya staves off sexual urges? Any other food that would have the same effect?
October 24th, 2013 at 02:40
Is underwater coitus hygeinic? Will saltwater, freshwater or chlorinated pool water seep into the vagina and/or cervix and make you ill?
October 24th, 2013 at 12:10
OMG!!
Like ko yang si Dr Agnes Bueno may show yan dati sa cable TV kapag madaling araw
Siya at si Ellen ng Oh Tokyo! ang aking mga ICON ng akoy musmos pa.
Tanong ko kay Dra.
Bakit kapag akoy nag JJK(master-beyt) minamalas ako at na guiguilty ako feeling ko ang sama sama ng aking ginawa kaya puro kamalasan nangyayari sakin at pinaparusahan ako ni Lord? HELP!!!
October 24th, 2013 at 16:46
Thank you so much for doing this after I suggested it. It’s been more than a decade since I first did on your radio show! LOL…good things to those who wait, I guess.
Strangely, although Dra. Bueno is known to the public as a sex expert, her subspecialty is actually in pediatric psychiatry. Please ask her what her thoughts are about ADHD and if it’s being over-diagnosed (at least here in the US, it seems to be so, much like a lot of psych diagnoses; everybody is on a psych and/or pain pill).
Also her thoughts on psychopathy and on why serial killing and mass murder (i.e. school, public place random shootings, etc.) seem to be a largely Western phenomenon. Serial killers and mass shooters are usually deemed sane to go through trial as they don’t fit any DSM criteria for any specific psychotic diagnosis and so are rightly declared so. But should there be a new pathology that should merit its own criteria for a new classification of perhaps a “hypo-psychosis?”
Regarding her work on human sexuality, I remember her mentioning once during a lecture that she actually trained under or worked with Masters and Johnson. I know that she did her residency at the University of Missouri and her fellowships at Baylor, but I don’t know if those famous two were somehow connected to any of those institutions. And if so, if she has any stories to tell about them and their work? Did they really watch people having orgasms and such? Does she subscribe to the new hypothesis that homosexuality and other transgender conditions could have epigenetic mechanics (i.e. modulated by biochemical mechanisms outside of the DNA itself) and that it could be brought about by certain hormonal stimulation that influences brain development in vitro? Is sexuality more fluid than previously thought? Could it be more so in women than men? (I separated homosexuality from transgender conditions because they are actually separate entities. A man could actually feel that he should be a woman but remain sexually attracted only to females for example.)
Please also ask her about her favorite books (not necessarily psych related), movies, works of art, etc. And if any of them prodded her interest in studying the mind.
And of course, Freud.
Lastly, please thank her for making med school a lot less boring and tedious.
October 25th, 2013 at 00:49
Narito ang aking tanong-saysay:
Maaari bang mawalan ng interes ang isang tao sa pakikipagtalik gayong dati’y (mga 2 years ago ang regular activity) wiling-wili siya sa gawaing ito? Ang taong ito’y monogamous at hindi naman niya masabing siya’y walang interes sa kanyang kabiyak dahil kapag mag-isa’y nakakapagpantasya naman siya. Ngunit kapag nandiyan na ang pagkakataon, siya’y wala nang interes. May gamot ba o supplement para dito? Hindi mahilig ang taong ito sa maanghang at paborito niyang prutas ang papaya.
October 25th, 2013 at 00:50
Maraming salamat sa pagpapaunlak, Ms. Jessica at Dr. Bueno.
October 25th, 2013 at 02:41
I meant IN UTERO, not in vitro. Sorry, was about to pass out in bed when I wrote that. LOL.
October 25th, 2013 at 05:41
Also, in light of her expertise in child psychiatry, please let her expound on autism, Asperger and autism spectrum in addition to ADHD. Thanks!
October 26th, 2013 at 08:53
A girl masturbating at 5 years old – is it normal, or is there a problem? Someone asked me this once, and she just did it because it felt nice and she liked imagining naked people, even though she didn’t know how sex worked yet. We’ve been meaning to find out for years.
October 28th, 2013 at 02:43
Here are my queries, Your Grace, to the good doctor:
1. Can daily masturbation contribute to prostate cancer in later years?
2. How come some have small penises while others are endowed? Genetics?
3. I read some articles and/or stories that some male artists who either cut their penises and/or lost them (either in medical surgery or injury), diminish their artistic capabilities. Is possessing a genital really contributed to aesthetics?
4. Is there a possibility that there are really some people genetically destined as a sex maniacs? Or the environment they belong trigger them to become such? Or both?
5. Why some people are insisting that “size” matters, while others, “performance”? Which is which, doctor?
6. Lastly, are you and Doctor Holmes friends?
That’s all, Your Grace.
October 28th, 2013 at 22:48
Can someone say they’ve got enough sex? I’ve been having a lot of ecstatic safe sex the past few mos and I’m loving it. Is it really possible to be practical about it? Meaning the higher the quantity, the higher the possibilities of quality? Parang the more entries you have, the more chances of winning.
I witnessed gays and lesbians pursuing certain ideals – wanting be straight. (Di na raw straight ang ruler, may curved ruler na kasing mabibili.) By repressing their sexual energies, it will surely seep out forcibly somehow – in plain words the’ve become anomalous mutants – bitchy without the humor, conduct unbecoming of a gaysha – unentertaining, graceless, and unwelcoming. Does repressing one’s sexual energy will end to being a wacko?
Is it true that it is only in the Philippines sex between males in exchange for money does not make the solicitous guy gay? Uso pa ba ang labelling sa Pilipinas?