Drogon is 6! Today he is The Oracle. Ask him all about your future.
Happy Birthday, Drogon Targaryen-Targaryen!
Do you have questions about life, love, work, cats, sleep, tennis, hair, coffee, sex, hopia, music, dogs, space, ink, paper, travel, anything that matters? Ask The Oracle!
Post your questions in Comments or @jessicazafrascats on Instagram. Then go and feed a stray cat, or watch A Quiet Place. By the time you come back, your answer will be waiting. Quick! The Oracle gets bored easily.
* * * * *
From Shona.
Happy Name Day! I hope to survive April, the cruellest month. Will I be able to?
Drogon says: Of course you will survive April. For starters you have to drop T.S. Eliot (It’s only temporary), and muse on other lyrics about April. I do not mean “Early morning, April 4,” because we know that the assassination occurred in the evening. Also: assassination.
I suggest e.e. cummings. Not April-specific, but spring.
Spring is like a perhaps hand
(which comes carefully
out of Nowhere)arranging
a window,into which people look(while
people stare
arranging and changing placing
carefully there a strange
thing and a known thing here)andchanging everything carefully
spring is like a perhaps
Hand in a window
(carefully to
and fro moving New and
Old things,while
people stare carefully
moving a perhaps
fraction of flower here placing
an inch of air there)andwithout breaking anything.
Believe that all will be well.
Next!
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
April 12th, 2018 at 02:38
Happy birthday, Drogon! I have a
question for your human. I’m on the lookout for
her reviews on lesbian films (or Women-loving-women films) that have been
released in the last few years and as far
as I can recall, I haven’t read one yet (or maybe she had and I didn’t notice, my mistake). I
remember back in 2013 when she reviewed
“Stranger by the Lake” a gay film which I like
and I enjoyed her comment on it that I talked about the topics that she brought up with my brother. La Vie
D’Adele (Blue is the Warmest Colour) was released that same festival in
Cannes concurrently with “Stranger” and I
haven’t read her comment. “Adele” has a
lesbian love story as a central theme but not
essentially a lesbian movie; nevertheless, I wondered what could be her
her opinion on the film and her perspective on its
controversial elements. I love her review on
CMBYN, but I also would like to know her opinion on a lesbian film that was shown in the
same year: “Thelma” a Norwegian film directed by Joachim Trier, and her opinion on Park
Chan-Wook’s “The Handmaiden”, I’m on the lookout on her opinion of
Patricia Highsmith’s “The Price of Salt” and its film
adaptation, “Carol.” I realised I have asked
more than one thing from you, I’ve been wanting to ask your human for some time and I thought that this could be my chance, I hope you’ll excuse me and I apologise. But if she will choose, I would like to
know her opinion on the films I’ve asked her
about. Thanks, Drogon and have a good year
to you and your human!
April 12th, 2018 at 08:05
Dear Drogon,
1. What is your favorite brand of cat food?
2. What advice can you give torpe people to overcome their torpeness? Asking for a friend.
3. Who would win a fight: Smaug or your katukayo Drogon?
Thanks!
Allan
April 12th, 2018 at 09:06
allancarreon: You forgot to wish me a happy birthday.
April 12th, 2018 at 10:28
allancarreon: Whatever. I am bored.
1. My tastes are simple. Fancy Feast and Friskies Paté.
2. If one turns to jelly in the presence of the be-liked, then set up group dates until he develops a spine.
3. It’s just “tukayo”.
April 12th, 2018 at 10:30
Happy Birthday, sweet patootie! What should your human call the Twisted reissue?
April 12th, 2018 at 10:31
“Here we are now. Entertain us.”
April 12th, 2018 at 10:55
Happy birthday Drogon Targaryen-Targaryen. I hope you are well.
Three questions:
1. Does True Love exist?
2. Is it a good idea to meet boys in bars?
3. What is your opinion on men who have their eyebrows threaded?
Thank you,
Von
April 12th, 2018 at 11:11
The Manila Survival Guide:
1. Yes, but first one must cleanse one’s mind of ridiculous notions planted by romantic comedies. Consider my human, who recently realized that she has patterned her behavior on Hollywood screwball comedies of the 1930s and 40s. Unfortunately real people do not behave like those in His Girl Friday or The Lady Eve or even The Philadelphia Story. She has had to reboot.
2. In Superbad Seth Rogen’s character says you don’t want to meet someone in a bar, you should meet them at an organic market or spinning class. However in real life people do go to bars, so go ahead and meet them there.
3. Being a cat, I have no eyebrows. I have no great objection to threading, though it seems like a huge production number when tweezers will do. The result is more important: If he looks like Celia Rodriguez as Valentina, perhaps not.
April 12th, 2018 at 11:47
Drogon, forgive me! That’s what one gets for commenting in the dead of night before falling asleep. Fancy Feast and Friskies Paté on me to make up for it when next I see the human.
Happy 6th birthday! That makes us roughly the same age in human years, if Purina is to be believed (https://www.purina.co.uk/cats/key-life-stages/ageing/cats-age-in-human-years).
P.S.Spine-free friend concurs. Spine-growing activities to commence, as per her.
April 12th, 2018 at 12:04
allancarreon: You are forgiven, ponytailed one.
If the spine-deficient one is female, the task is much easier. She need only make herself interesting by taking an interest in their interests. Onward!
April 12th, 2018 at 13:15
Happiest name day, sweet Drogon! That’s from Bathilda Brienne Bagshot Stan, myself and the doggies.
Question : Been very busy and focused with family-related and work-related concerns, that I think it’s time for a change. How do you think I should go about dating or just generally going out with guys?
Thanks so much. May you be smothered with lots of treats today.???
April 12th, 2018 at 13:30
brewhuh23: First, be nice to yourself. Catch up on lost sleep. Get a haircut or something. Review your wardrobe, put all the clothes you don’t wear anymore in a bag and give them to whoever might want them, or to charity. Take lessons in something: calligraphy, mixed martial arts, whatever—the farther from your usual activities, the better. Go on a trip, it doesn’t have to be far.
The point is not to look for a date specifically, but to rearrange circumstances so that dating becomes more of a possibility. Do not go out there wearing a neon sign that says “I need a date” because that would summon the very people you don’t want to get near.
Also, volunteer at a pet shelter!
No amount of treats can be enough. I want more!
April 12th, 2018 at 13:35
Got it! Thanks, Drogon.
April 12th, 2018 at 13:39
brewhuh23: Human says, Let’s go shopping!
April 12th, 2018 at 14:39
Happy birthday, Drogon T-T! More kibbles for you today and forevermore.
1. Which living arrangement do you think is best for you: living with a hot cat mate in a plush 2-bedroom apartment or slumming in your human’s comfy home as a bachelor? Why.
2. Should I self-publish my very short stories?
3. I’m always tired and sleepy. Am I dying or just lazy?
Thank you, tsup tsup
April 12th, 2018 at 14:49
Let’s gooooo!!!
April 12th, 2018 at 14:54
Happy birthday, Drogon! I hope you enjoy this day.
After being denied for non-Asian visas twice, I feel so demotivated and old. After 10+ years of settling here and pressing pause on my dreams, I’m working on how I can afford to finally move somewhere else and work or study overseas. Any advice how to deal with it? Thanks!
April 12th, 2018 at 15:04
lestat:
1. I like living in my human’s apartment, which is not comfy. It looks like a warehouse for storing books and papers, and the furniture situation is dire. She says we can’t get nice furniture anyway because we cats will sharpen our claws on them. This is true. We made a hole in the old couch and then in her old mattress plus Saffy peed on them so the human had to throw them out.
That said, this arrangement is ideal for me because I prefer to remain free and unattached to material possessions. Periodically the human pulls her hair and cries, “Why do I have so much stuff!” Things are a trap.
I am neutered so I do not have a mate. It seems to me that the time for mating and nesting should be after one is tired of seeing what is out there. Otherwise one will think they have missed out on something.
2. Before self-publishing, consider submitting one story for publication. It would give you a clearer idea of the publishing options, while testing how you react to readers’ reactions.
3. If you feel tired and sleepy without actually having done anything to be tired about, perhaps you need to get your circulation up. Walk home from work everyday. Or are you using sleep to hide from less pleasant reality? It is highly unlikely that you are dying.
Bisous!
April 12th, 2018 at 15:14
amypond: If visa applications to non-Asian countries have been denied, perhaps it is because you do not have much of a travel history, so the consuls cannot ascertain whether you are coming back. I suggest that you travel around Asia a bit. With promo fares, it is sometimes cheaper to go to HK or Bangkok than to Palawan or Boracay. Perhaps you might even consider studying or working within the region. It would not mean changing your plans, just adding a step before you get to the farther destination.
The human always says the way to get a visa is to not give a toss whether they grant you one or not. True, now that the visa process is outsourced and you do not actually speak to the people who make the decisions, it is more complicated.
April 12th, 2018 at 15:55
Thank you, Drogon! I will watch A Quiet Place for sure!
April 12th, 2018 at 16:42
Many happy returns, Drogon! The Twisted reissue should have an albino mosquito on the cover.
My questions for the Oracle Du Jour:
1. A little background: Last July, I mentored this guy in the office who lately has been getting too close for comfort with me. He’s married with children–three children with three different women (one of the mistresses gave birth ahead of the legal wife, what in tarnation). I have no plans of becoming the fourth “woman” (or make that fifth, or nth, I don’t know–after our mentorship he confessed of a false alarm with another woman, oy vey) but I would lie if I said I’m not liking the attention. At first I swore not to read into anything but my overthinking now screams, “Overcompensation! He’s been carrying on affairs because he really is into…. people of my ilk!” But no. Sais pas.
Recently he said he wanted us to set aside a day that we would spend alone, just the two of us, and I was like, “What are you hoping to achieve with this?” He shrugged off the question, retorting that not everything has to have a reason–that he only wants to spend a day and a NIGHT alone with me (shudder).
He is neither a Derek Ramsay nor a Daniel Matsunaga (I’ve jested whether his “family jewels” are indeed made of gold & diamonds, what with all his women). In the interest of fairness, he’s sensitive, witty, funny, and a responsible father (he’s committed to supporting his kids–which should be the case anyway). But he should stop spawning–with non-wives at least.
The point is–how do I avoid him? I’ve told him to stop making landi. We see each other daily in the office and despite my having transferred to another team, he still drops by my cubicle to make kulit. Or let me rephrase the question, if I start seeing someone else, do you think he’ll finally get it? Problem is, I’ve been single for so long that I have the same question as brewhuh23’s: how to go about seeing other people.
2. Why do so many men think they’re god’s gift to women? (Is this rhetorical?)
3. What kind of entry do you think will help me win (or anyone now for that matter) a Palanca? I mean is there anything in particular the judges are looking for, aside from the work being beautiful?
4. When is your human publishing her novel? We’ve been waiting!
Wishing you a spate of treats. I’ll hand over a treat for you when I meet your human next time.
April 12th, 2018 at 17:33
Happy birthday Drogon! I hope your human gave you an extra serving of your favorite treats! (Agree with you on wanting more but we need to be svelte to be agile).
Drogon, what does the future hold for me?
Labyu!
April 12th, 2018 at 18:43
Daphne Cavill-Evans:
1. You story sounds bizarre, but it is not that rare. People are bizarre. Who knows what is going on with that guy. Perhaps he wishes to break the Ramon Revilla record for total offspring. Why is he so intent on spreading his genes, does he want to go into politics?
As for his interest in you, though you say you are flattered, I think: Cooties! Eww! If you are not interested in him outside of the flattery, then it should be easy enough to avoid him. No matter how “sensitive, witty, funny and responsible” he may seem, he is still being an asshole to his wife and mistresses.
It is not even necessary to start seeing someone to send the point across. (It would also be unfair to the other person.) Say no. Tell him that you do not want to hang out with him, much less spend “a day and a night alone”. If he persists, write to him and tell him you do not want to be part of this game he’s playing and that you do not want to cause any more pain for his wife and mistresses than they already have.
If he still does not stop, tell his wife and mistresses. No, wait, they’re probably hypnotized and will take his side.
You must have friends at the office. Ask them to help you by never leaving you alone with him. If he approaches your desk, they should surround you. They should make like the Dora Milaje, earrings and spears optional.
2. Because their mothers raised them to think that, and because macho Filipino culture drills it into them. It is time for the sisterhood to slap down this kind of behavior.
3. It really depends on the judges in each category. All you can do is write as well as you are capable, and submit the entry by deadline.
4. It will appear when it appears. She is already working on the next one.
Thank you for the treats!
April 12th, 2018 at 18:49
greeneggsnham: Yes, I got extra treats. Last week our human decided that we were too heavy and started giving us slightly smaller portions. I can jump to the top of the filing cabinet in a single bound!
You will move to a new job that allows you to broaden your skill sets. It will give you greater responsibility and maybe more stress, but you actually enjoy that. You will continue to move up in your industry, and make friends with Elon Musk. And then you will buy me a Tesla and a ticket to Mars.
Mwah!
April 13th, 2018 at 04:40
Happy birthday Drogon! Stay gorgeous, you gorgeous kitty.
Oh and I already saw A Quiet Place because we’ve been in love with Emily Blunt ever since she first fought aliens in Edge of Tomorrow.
April 13th, 2018 at 04:56
Happy Birthday, Drogon!
Love from Monica PusangGiliw and her entire CatClan, Holden, Jay, Milky, Peanut, Butter, Ampie, Darcy and HappyFace
Here is a question: When is the right time to give someone a lover letter?
April 13th, 2018 at 07:43
frans83: Thank you! We love the Krasinski-Blunts, aka the Krunts haha.
Edge of Tomorrow is seriously underrated. It is Groundhog Day with Aliens, with Tom Cruise dying every five minutes or sooner.
April 13th, 2018 at 07:53
juleste: Thanks and give the clan my love.
Hmm love letters. Before my human’s best friend since the second grade died, she gave my human two pieces of advice. One, don’t give cats too much milk, it gives them the runs. Two, don’t write love letters because it can be used as evidence against you.
My human has followed her best friend’s advice (And I like milk! And ice cream! And cheese!) although she has been tempted to write love letters. In her case it is a good thing she didn’t because she gets bored and will have to disavow the letters. But if you are absolutely sure that your feelings will not change, or that if they do you will not be embarrassed to admit that they existed at some point, go ahead.
Here’s a workaround: Pretend it is fiction. Sneaky!
April 13th, 2018 at 07:56
Massive apologies to Ursula.addresses, whose question was mistakenly marked as spam.
The human’s viewing, like her reading, has lagged and she has not seen Blue Is The Warmest Color or Thelma. The Handmaiden she started watching at her friend’s house, but then they went out to dinner and chismis and she has not had the time to finish it. But she has seen Carol and says it is glorious. Some of her friends thought Cate Blanchett’s acting was way over the top, but she thinks it was appropriate to the movie’s very stylized, almost arch adaptation of Highsmith. Human has always admired the work of Todd Haynes, which reminds her that Wonderstruck has been waiting.
I think Carol, like Elf and Die Hard, is required Xmas viewing.
April 13th, 2018 at 08:10
With that, The Oracle ends his consultations. We remember the original Oracle, Koosi, aka The Mighty Goddess Bast.
The Oracle will be back in mid-June, on Saffy’s birthday.
Ciao ciao meow.
April 13th, 2018 at 09:10
Happy Birthday, Drogon Targaryen-Targaryen! Is it too late to ask for your wisdom?
Since breaking up from a five-year (gay) relationship last May, I’ve been trying to discover myself and go out with other people at the same time, a task I’m finding very hard to juggle. I realize through introspection and by listening to talks on youtube that I have abandonment issues—I fall for a guy who is emotionally unavailable. The more they become distant, the more obsessed I become to them. I find guys who are nice and available boring. In retrospect, I was like this with my ex. The more I felt that we were growing apart, the more I seek for his attention, and then in turn he would become even more distant and I would become even more needy.
I’ve been meditating and trying to be aware of this feeling, but then it is really difficult to get rid of something that basically I attribute as part of my “character.” I’ve been like that ever since I could remember, and it’s only recently that I became aware of it.
A couple of months ago, I met a Latino and we started hanging out. I find him very intelligent and sensible, and his ideas about life and work are refreshing. There is a catch though. From the very beginning, he made it clear that he could not be my boyfriend. We could continue to fool around, and he could be my best friend, but we could not be together. I should have fled after hearing this, but part of me rationalized that I should continue to see him.
I played it cool at first, not thinking about him and only messaging him maybe once or twice a week, but then we spent an entire weekend together and I got attached. I’m back to my old pattern. I’m obsessed. I’ve been looking at his Instagram and Facebook posts, and I found out that he’s been spending time with another guy. Thankfully, I have enough self-control to not bombard him with messages. The last time I messaged him was last Tuesday to ask him out for coffee, but then he said that he had plans.
So I thought the best way to stop obsessing about him is to find another guy, so I met a new one and we are making plans to go out of town end of April. A part of me thinks that this is a bad idea because I fear that I would just fall into the same pattern. But then I don’t want to be a person who is paralyzed by fear. I want to live my life. What do you think? Do you think it’s part of the process to go out with a lot of people in bad dates before finding the right one? Am I overthinking this?
In the end, I want to find someone who will be there and share mornings with me. Is that too much to ask these days? I sometimes feel like I am both rushing and delaying connection at the same time. So difficult to find that sweet spot in the middle. I’m 35 years old and I could not help but feel that my best days are behind me. Is there hope?
April 13th, 2018 at 11:22
kracle: The Oracle refuses to work overtime as he is sleepy. I have outsourced your questions to the survivors of my first workshop. They will post their answers in a bit.
April 13th, 2018 at 12:18
chiming in!
kracle:
That period when you’ve just got out of a long-term relationship is a great time to discover yourself because you’re no longer obligated to do couple activities (unless those are what you’re into). You can enjoy a meal, watch a movie, and do things that excite you as an individual. Then you can meet people or go on dates, with a better idea of what you like out of a relationship (or out of life in general).
The situation with the Latino guy, although not to your liking, sounds ideal. He offers fooling around and friendship, and that’s more than what some guys would offer. Friendship also tends to last longer than relationships. Let me know if you need help hiding a friend’s posts on Instagram or Facebook because that might help.
You could go on dates that might turn out great or bad, but it’s not ‘part of the process’ to go out on bad ones (especially not on purpose). The gay dating scene can be cruel, but 35 is way too early to start despairing.
April 14th, 2018 at 02:11
Kracle,
It’s been a long (but fruitful) day, and only now did I get a chance to absorb your dilemma and think about what to tell you. Fortunately, my buddy Lestat already responded, and I concur with all he has to say.
I do want to add a couple of things:
Latinos are great; the stereotype about their passion is true, at least based on a fling I had with a Colombian a couple of years ago. We still stay in touch, we flirt online, we talk. So Lestat is correct: that situation may be ideal for you for now.
You came out of a five-year relationship, so just enjoy yourself. Trust me: 35 means your best days are probably still ahead of you. I should know as I’ve been there. However, if you have it in your head that 35 means you are now a fossil, then a fossil you be. But if you believe it will get more exciting, then it will.
But that will happen only if you can do it on your own as well first.
Dating will always be hit-miss. But if you start seeing a pattern in your behavior that you do not like or do not find healthy, step back a bit, maybe slap yourself (kidding), breathe, and take time off. Detoxify.
Cliche as it may sound: love yourself first.
April 14th, 2018 at 09:54
The Oracle says:
Try being alone for a while. Say, eight weeks of relationship rehab. Read a book (Not a love story. No self-help. Detective thrillers. Alan Furst or Andrea Camilleri). Watch movies (The Antoine Doinel series by Francois Truffaut). Spend some time with yourself. You are the project.
April 26th, 2018 at 19:40
Belated Happy birthday Drogon Targaryen-Targaryen. Cool pose.Greeting also from my feline friend Hopia.
I just wanted to ask you :
A) How does one find their writing voice ?
B) What is your favorite quote?
C) What do you think about Tagalog romance novels ?
? Ex.Precious hearts , My Special Valentine ?
Just random questions.. Thanks.