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Ernie and Bert wanted to try the new restaurant in Salcedo Village near Makati Sports, across from Apt 1B. ‘What’s it called?’ I asked. ‘La Cuisine Francaise,’ they said. It’s a bit like naming beer Beer na Beer, but it preempts the next question, What kind of food do they serve?

‘Is this one of those chi-chi restaurants with tiny servings that I’m expected to ooh and aah over even if I don’t know what I’m ooh-ing and aah-ing about?’ I asked. When I eat, I like to know I’ve eaten. Inhaling mesclun does not constitute a meal.

‘I hope not,’ said Ernie. ‘They have an excellent pecan pie.’ Ernie judges restaurants on the basis of their desserts. Bert periodically turns vegetarian on us, so he prefers restaurants that serve dishes that contain no meat. I like restaurants with waiters who do not interview me after each course to find out if the food was to my liking. Is there anything in my demeanor that radiates peace and goodwill to all? I really should carry my sword around but it’s heavy.

Ernie and I arrived early and ordered the Chicken Liver Pate. It was so good we finished all of it before it occurred to me to take a picture. Next time I go there the appetizer will be my main course.

For the main course we had a choice of roast chicken, roast pork, and sole. According to the menu the roast chicken contained 40 cloves of garlic. I cannot resist the idea of 40 cloves of garlic, so I ordered that. I didn’t count the cloves but there were a lot. Ernie had the pork and Bert the vegetarian lasagna.

They had run out of the vaunted pecan pie, but we had a rich chocolate cake and the macarons which the proprietors sell at the Salcedo weekend market. The owner Michele d’Orival said hello. She described their food as “Provencal housewife”—good, hearty meals.

The meal—appetizers, a carafe of the house red, main course, dessert, coffee—cost us P800-1,000 apiece. So we probably won’t be dining there everyday, but we’ll be back. La Cuisine’s website: www.lacuisine.ph.

Re your question: Alas, our $60 (for 3, including taxes and tips) did not qualify for public funding.