JessicaRulestheUniverse.com

Personal blog of Jessica Zafra, author of The Collected Stories and the Twisted series
Subscribe

Archive for September, 2009

Our guests

September 15, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Announcements, Current Events 3 Comments →

Our panelists at the Good Ideas Forum on September 26 are Teddy Boy Locsin and Vince Perez.

Teddy Boy Locsin is the congressman from Makati. He hosts an AM radio talk show and should really get back on television. Ted was the publisher and editor-in-chief of TODAY, and before that, the Daily Globe and the Free Press. He was Press Secretary in the Cory Aquino administration, and speechwriter to President Aquino. Ted had a cat named Tommasso who was so fat and lazy he would not budge from his seat during earthquakes. Apart from his erudite and nasty essays on politics, Ted has written extensively on hair loss and bad smells.

Vince Perez is a conservationist and advocate of renewable energy. He runs Alternergy Partners, a renewable power company, and heads the energy advisory firm Merritt Partners. Vince is also the chair of WWF-Philippines. He was a general partner at Lazard Freres and is a former Secretary of Energy. Vince was part of the Subic Centennial crew which won the 2008 Rolex South China Sea Race. He describes his role on the boat as “ballast”. Though he once appeared in a series of energy conservation sketches, he is not to be confused with the actor Vahnsahnt Perez.

Both panelists have held important positions in the private and public sectors, giving them unique insights into the process of turning a concept into reality. They will listen to your ideas at the forum and make suggestions about the next steps. Coffee and doughnuts will be served. Photography is allowed. Blogging is encouraged.

Symbological Liberation Army

September 14, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Places, Tennis 5 Comments →

Louvre 4
Paris, May 2006. The pyramid at the Louvre, a stop in the Da Vinci Code pilgrimage. Of course: To solve an ancient mystery, check out the newest structures in the Louvre.

I received an invitation from National Bookstore to the official release of the new Dan Brown novel, The Lost Symbol, 11.30 pm tonight (eve of the worldwide release on 15 September) at Glorietta 5. Naturally I’m going. It’s not a literary event—the concepts “Dan Brown” and “literature” don’t really go together—but it’s definitely an event. In this global recession, the American publishing industry looks to the Dan Brown as the messiah that will raise publishing from the abyss.

Found The Da Vinci Code cheesy and dumb, but read all of it in one sitting anyway (What, you don’t do things to annoy yourself? Why do you read this then). It reminded me of Nancy Drew—each chapter ends in a cliffhanger so you can’t stop. I thought the guys who wrote Holy Blood, Holy Grail should sue Brown. They did, and lost.

Apart from rescuing the publishing industry from the infernal pits, will Lost Symbol do for its location, wherever it is, what Da Vinci Code did for Paris? I remember the Parisians turning up their noses at the hordes of tourists in T-shirts, shorts, thick sneakers and butt bags congregating at the Louvre clutching copies of the Dan Brown in their meaty hands, clogging the room of Leonardo’s La Gioconda so she still looks like a postcard from where you stand, and taking pictures with the flash when flash photography is expressly forbidden. And they still took their money. Ah, Paris.

2340. Lots of guests and media.

The Stocks

A TV crew ask to interview me. I say, Are you sure, I’m not a fan.

Why are you here then, they ask. So I can be the first to trash it, I reply. Unless it turns out to be brilliant, and I love a shock. This book is review-proof anyway, people will buy it no matter what its critics say. Plus I wish I had Dan Brown’s sales figures, and I want to figure out his secret.

Any idea what the book is about? they say. Well, the teaser has a picture of George Washington and the words “He could not tell a lie. But he could keep a secret”. So I’m guessing it involves American history. And George W. And a secret.

0005, Tuesday, September 15. I grab my review copy and skedaddle. I am an expert at skedaddling, it takes skill, practice, and an antisocial nature.

0010. I discover that at midnight all the pedestrian underpasses on Ayala between Edsa and Makati Avenue are closed, and if you want to cross the street you have to jump over the rails then jaywalk. We’re just roadkill out here. I end up taking a taxi to the Peninsula, which is ridiculous.

0020. Blast, I am too late for the Pen’s anniversary price rollback which ended at 2359. Wanted pancit luglug and halo-halo at 1970s prices. I call my sister to meet me at Old Swiss Inn instead.

The Brown

0030. Finally crack the book open. The first line of the prologue: “The secret is how to die.” Ooh, that’s right up there with an icy shiver running down your neck. On a dark and stormy night.

If you think I’m a snot my sister won’t even deign to read Da Vinci Code.

Maybe I’ll read Lost Symbol in the next few hours while waiting for the Federer v. Del Porno final at the US Open. Hey I’m at Old Swiss Inn wearing my Federer pin. 16!

* * * * *

Not only do we get The Lost Symbol twelve hours ahead of New York, we get it cheaper. The book’s cover price is US$29.95, about P1497. It is now available at all National Bookstores nationwide at P780, nearly half the cover price. It’s a good way to get non-readers to pick up the book, and maybe the habit of reading.

* * * * *

Holy crap Del Potro def. Federer 3-6, 7-6, 4-6, 7-6, 6-2.

Our idols need to be taken down a notch every so often to remind them they are human. And to behave. (Uma-attitude?! Ayan, napalo.) The post-Wimbledon coronation-canonization in the media can’t be good for anyone. That kind of praise only means one thing: at the first sign of weakness, they’re coming to get you.

New blood is always good for the game so welcome to the big time, Juan Martin Del Potro.

Cat guarding Foucault's Pendulum, Paris, September 2009. Photo by Juan Chua.
Cat guards Foucault’s Pendulum. Paris, September 2009. Photo by Juan Chua.

How to get jet lag without getting on a jet

September 14, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Technology 3 Comments →

I do not have the statistics to back up this hypothesis, but I suspect that at least half of all lost mobile phones, personal digital assistants, personal music players, cameras, laptops and netbooks belong to people who work on the night shift.

They report to their call center after sundown and work through the night. In the morning they emerge into the sunlight and make their way home. Even if they have trained themselves to sleep through the day and stay awake at night, they live in a state of artificial jet lag.

Human beings do need to see sunlight, and to shut down for a complete systems check when it gets dark. Quite simply, their circadian rhythms are shot.

Lack of sleep leads to diminished alertness, slowness, and poor memory. You’re trying to function normally, but your body just wants to shut down. It is in this physical state that you are likely to forget, misplace, or drop your gadgetry, or get mugged.

The Limbo of Lost Gadgets in Emotional Weather Report, yesterday in the Star.

My sister manages a call center. She’s been part of the Jet Lag Set for five years, although she does get to take the jet once in a while (to a place where, she gleefully reports, people shoot deer.) I worry about the lifestyle. Obviously her sleep patterns are shot. Then there’s the matter of nutrition. In my observation, call center employees live on a diet of fast food grease and things nuked in convenience stores. I myself subsist on cholesterol, caffeine, and sugar, and when I start worrying about nutrition you know the situation is dire.

Many call centers pride themselves on their medical coverage and benefits. How about making sure that your employees have proper meals? Set up cafeterias that serve healthier food to the staff, or at least things that won’t corrode their systems by age 25. You turn them into vampires (and not the fun kind that live forever), at least feed them right.

Call Me Sir

September 13, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Cats, Tennis 6 Comments →

Coffee Bean Cat

Yes I’m one of Those People who bring their laptops to coffee shops and work there. I don’t have WiFi in my building. Why don’t you get WiFi then? Because I know myself, and I know that if I get WiFi I will never leave the house again.

So I’m sitting by the window at a Coffee Bean and a cat, sensing the presence of the Emperor of the Universe, curls up in the seat next to mine. Shouldn’t it be Empress? Yes, but it’s all the same: People will still call me Sir. Perfectly understandable on the phone—when I have a cold I sound like Kathleen Turner morphing into Tom Waits. In person, boggling.

Actual conversation.

Barista: Sir, may I take your order?
Me: Do I look like a man to you?
Barista: No, Sir.
Me: Carry on.

At least I don’t get called Sirma’am/Ma’amsir.

The other night Ernie and I were at a coffee shop when two guys walked in, sat next to us, and started conversing in very loud voices. It was the volume that didn’t just invite eavesdropping, it demanded eavesdropping. The sad part was, their conversation was duller than dirt. They could only be. . .heterosexual male yuppies.

In a voice as loud as theirs I said, “I think it’s a hearing impairment!” They didn’t get it, or they didn’t care. Five minutes later I was going to say something implying substandard equipment specs but they got up and left. I’ve never seen an actual brawl in a coffee shop, I wonder what that would be like.

If you’re going to invite eavesdroppers, make sure you’re not boring.

At the US Open women’s semifinal between Serena Williams and the returning Kim Clijsters: Was Serena being a brat, or did the linesperson err in calling a foot fault that led to match point? Remember that the foot fault rule is never taken seriously; on the other hand it is a rule.

* * * * *

0300. Holy crap Del Potro just whitewashed Nadal 2, 2, and 2.

* * * * *

At 6-5, 30-love in the third set, Roger Federer hits a cross-court winner from the baseline between his legs with his back to the net. Federer defeats Djokovic, 7-6, 7-5, 7-5. On to the final.

Not once, but twice!

September 13, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Movies 3 Comments →

Pepe Diokno wins two prizes at 2009 Venice Film Festival
Closing Ceremony: Red Carpet 66th Venice Film Festival

Make that two. Engkwentro, the first feature by Pepe Diokno, won the Orizzonti (New Horizons) Prize at the 2009 Venice Film Festival. Pepe Diokno also won the Luigi De Laurentiis Lion of the Future Award for a Debut Film, which comes with a prize of 100,000 USD donated by Filmauro, to be divided equally between director and producer.

How do you like the Pinoy indies now?

Things that struck me as accurate

September 13, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Movies, Notebooks 5 Comments →

La Jetee
You can watch Chris Marker’s La Jetée here

‘I will have spent my life trying to understand the function of remembering. Which is not the opposite of forgetting but rather its lining. We do not remember: we rewrite memory much as history is rewritten.’ Chris Marker, Sans Soleil

‘It’s not enough to love a woman when she is so difficult. You must love her tremendously. More even than one’s own dignity.’ Nicolas Roeg, Bad Timing

‘Life makes sense not when reason tells you that everything is as it should be. Life makes sense when some imponderable and apparently random even confirms your most irrational prejudices about the world.’ From Afghanistan, a novel by Alex Ullmann

I record these bits in a small notebook that I always carry so I’ll have something to read in case I run out of books on the road. It’s like the dead brother’s baseball glove in that much-loved novel, the one that had poems written on it so he wouldn’t get bored while waiting for the pitch. Of course Oscar Wilde recommends never traveling without your diary, because one should always have something sensational to read on the train.

* * * * *

This just in: Pepe Diokno’s Engkwentro has won the Orizzonti prize (Best feature film in the New Horizons section) of the Venice Film Festival 2009!

Don’t know how the local box-office is doing but after the victories in Cannes and Venice, 2009 is officially a great year for Philippine cinema. I hope whatever official entity is in charge of promoting Filipino cinema uses the opportunity to do a real global marketing campaign. Our filmmakers have done the spade work, don’t leave them out there scrounging for funds so they can show up at festivals and markets.

* * * * *

The invitations to the Good Ideas Forum have been sent out. If you posted a Good Idea but did not receive an invitation, please repost your idea in the Comments section of this post (so we’re sure to spot it) and The Elves will contact you.