JessicaRulestheUniverse.com

Dark skies, rumbling thunder, flashing lightning: RP faces Kazakhstan in the bowl final. Photo by JZ.

Even if you have seen rugby on TV, watching it live for the first time is disconcerting. It looks chaotic and barbarous; it does not seem to make sense. If you have become friendly with the players your face is frozen into a grimace—they are getting clobbered.

But here’s the thing: they signed up to get clobbered. On some level, they want to get clobbered.

This is one of the reasons the sport of rugby may be a hard sell in the Philippines. It’s not that Pinoys don’t want to get hurt—we have full-contact basketball, and we have some terrific boxers. But Pinoys value paporma, papogi, looking good. Why would anyone want to get beaten up and not get paid for it?

The Rugby Chronicles 3: Brutal, but nice in Emotional Weather Report, today in the Philippine Star.

Justin Coveney was named Most Improved Player, Noel Flowers the Coach’s Player, and Patrice Olivier the Players’ Player of the Philippine team at the Borneo 7s. Photo by JZ.

In her column about today’s event my editor calls me a shorts-chaser.

At age 6 Cristobal Balenciaga cut his first coat for his cat.

My cats prefer nudity.

Scary mother: Piper Laurie in Brian De Palma’s Carrie.

Amy Chua, Yale Law professor, daughter of Filipino-Chinese immigrants, is generating a bit of controversy with her new book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. Her book tackles the question, How do Chinese parents produce math wizards and music prodigies? The answer begins with a list of things Chinese mothers don’t allow their kids to do:

• attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• watch TV or play computer games
• choose their own extracurricular activities
• get any grade less than an A
• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin
• not play the piano or violin.

Read Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior in WSJ.

“Some might think that the American sports parent is an analog to the Chinese mother. This is so wrong,” Chua writes. “Unlike your typical Western overscheduling soccer mom, the Chinese mother believes that (1) schoolwork always comes first; (2) an A-minus is a bad grade; (3) your children must be two years ahead of their classmates in math; (4) you must never compliment your children in public; (5) if your child ever disagrees with a teacher or coach, you must always take the side of the teacher or coach; (6) the only activities your children should be permitted to do are those in which they can eventually win a medal; and (7) that medal must be gold.”

David Brooks at the NYT replied with a column, Amy Chua Is A Wimp. I have not read Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother but its title (and the excerpt) leads me to suspect that Brooks is a little irony-challenged. The author has obviously cast herself as the super-villain of the piece.

Personally I think the over-emphasis on building a child’s self-esteem produces a lot of dimwits with an exaggerated sense of entitlement.

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This reminds me of a poem by the great English poet (and librarian) Philip Larkin.

This Be The Verse

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.

Noel sent me this NYT article on Adultery and how it’s so much worse if it happens in your bed. (What more if it were your refrigerator.) Read Don’t Try This at Home—Adultery in the Marital Bed.

“Conventions change. A woman no longer earns a scarlet letter for having a child out of wedlock; divorce is not synonymous with scandal; and it is no surprise to find, when a marriage comes apart, that a third person was involved. But even in a sexually liberal culture, the home is still usually off-limits, as if protected by an invisible force field. And the marriage bed — a phrase that in itself seems quaintly out of date — remains a sacred object.

All but one of 18 marriage counselors and divorce lawyers interviewed for this article said they saw at-home adultery rarely, if ever, although the divorce lawyers saw it more often than the therapists. When it does happen, however, the consequences are usually dire: affairs are painful in a marriage, but affairs that take place in the marriage bed can be lethal. . .”

I love the bit where they quote The Sopranos. Yeah, there’s a moral compass.

One consequence of adultery: dead bunnies.

This brings us to this LitWit Challenge 4.5: Bed of Nails.

The Situation: You walk in on your spouse having sex on your bed with someone not yourself, seeing as you have not mastered the swami trick of bilocation.

The Catch: If you’re a biological female, you have to write it from the point of view of the aggrieved husband. If you’re a biological male, you have to write it from the point of view of the aggrieved wife.

Tip: Avoid the obvious. Revenge comedies are most welcome.

Word limit: 1,000 words, preferably less.

Deadline: 11.59 pm Monday, 24 January 2011.

The Prize:
David Mitchell’s Cloud Atlas and this notebook.

The Weekly LitWit Challenge is brought to you by our friends at National Bookstore.

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P.S. What would you do?

A. Kill them both.
B. Run off screaming.
C. Scream, throw things, and attack them physically.
D. Pretend you didn’t see anything.
E. Take photos or video and put them on facebook.
F. Leave and never come back (Send someone to get your stuff).
G. Cheat on spouse immediately.
H. Cheat on spouse immediately with the same person he/she was cheating on you with, announce “Ha! I’m gay!” then get the third party to announce that they prefer you.
I. Act like you don’t care.
J. You really don’t care.
K. Other reaction (Specify).