The Weekly LitWit Challenge 6.8: How to Dance With Dragons EXTENDED
As everyone has gone into vacation mode including ourselves, we are accepting entries to LitWit Challenge 6.8 until 12 noon on Wednesday, 31 August 2011. Meanwhile enjoy turmukoy’s excellent Danaerys story in the form of a letter to Auntie Janey Xerex. (Rated NC-17, read in Comments).
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From the HBO series: Robb and Bran with their direwolf pups.
For his sprawling fantasy epic A Song of Ice and Fire George R.R. Martin has been called The American Tolkien. We love the Westeros novels and approve of the HBO series; we’ll even condone Martin’s readiness to kill off major protagonists we are fond of as long as that sexy dwarf Tyrion Lannister makes it to the end.
This week we’re giving away a brand new (with that fresh ink smell!) copy of the newly-released fifth volume of SIAF, A Dance With Dragons. If you were wondering at the absence of our beloved Tyrion and our candidate for the true king Jon Snow from the fourth volume A Feast For Crows, it’s because the events in DWD were supposed to be included in the fourth book. However, Mr. Martin decided to divide the fourth book in two—a wise decision as the whole volume would’ve caused shelves to crash everywhere. The division explains why the events in DWD are simultaneous with those in FFC.
(DWD also reveals the fate of one you have wished ill upon since the third volume, a fate so horrendous you find yourself pitying him. And then Martin spins it so you actually start rooting for him. That’s impressive.)
A Dance With Dragons weighs in at 1,020 pages and is thick enough to serve as an extra coffee table. Do you want this book? Of course you do. Yes the e-book is lighter but it won’t tone your biceps, stop doors (or bullets), or signal to other Song of Ice and Fire devotees that you inhabit their universe.
We bow to GRRM’s mastery of plot, but find much of the prose a bit cringe-worthy. Then again, we wish there were more action in In Search of Lost Time, because Marcel Proust does go on about madeleines.
Your assignment: In 1,000 words or less, rewrite any scene from the SIAF books in your own words. The finding of the direwolf pups? Danaerys’s controversial wedding night? The “crowning” of that bitch Viserys? The shocking killing we didn’t think would happen until we read/saw it?
Post your entry in Comments on or before Sunday, 28 August 2011 at 11.59pm.
This year’s model barbarian: Jason Momoa. As Khal Drogo in Game of Thrones or as Conan the Barbarian in the new movie, Jason Momoa makes all other men look like little girls.
P.S. Our cats wear the colors of the Great Houses. Koosi, being blonde, is a Lannister. Saffy, dark, is Stark. Mat, white, is Targaryen.
P.P.S. Yes, you may write yourself into the novels. So bring on your weddings to Khal Drogo, Jon Snow, Robb Stark, Jaime Lannister, Jorah Mormont (We know someone), Loras Tyrell, Sansa Stark, Asha Stark, Cersei Lannister or the madwoman breastfeeding her four-year-old.
The Weekly LitWit Challenge is brought to you by our friends at National Bookstore.
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
August 23rd, 2011 at 00:34
Oh my goodness, Game of Thrones!
I marathon-ed season 1 and I instantly fell in love with the Khal! Momoa was in Baywatch Hawaii and he was drop dead gorgeous.
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/5986/jasonmomoa1.jpg
If he was the one who’ll be saving me, I will make drowning a hobby hahaha.
At the recent Comic-con, Game of Thrones producers divulged that when he auditioned for the role of Khal Drogo, he (Momoa) performed the Haka and ripped his shirt off. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Lisa Bonet is a VERY lucky lady :)
In furnace, in the show, I was rooting for the Khal Drogo/Daenerys Targaryen love team haha!
When I’m not drooling over the Khal, my heart yearns for Jon Snow hehe. Can’t wait for season 2.
August 23rd, 2011 at 01:25
Oh no. Just when I thought I could get by with just fantasizing about submitting entries to LitWit, you come up with this…
August 23rd, 2011 at 02:16
can the entry be written in hodor-ese?
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:28
Hodor yes.
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:36
brewhuh23: Hah! You cannot have Jon Snow ever. He has taken the black, they have a vow of celibacy.
August 23rd, 2011 at 12:21
jessicazafra: better that than rooting for (SPOILER DELETED) Drogo. Well, people hate me for it but my groin belongs to Sansa.
August 24th, 2011 at 00:23
#5 jessica – Oh drats! Forgot about that vow :(
August 29th, 2011 at 03:25
dear kuya xerex,
magandang araw sa iyo at sa iyong mga masusugid na mambabasa. nais ko lamang sanang ibahagi ang aking karanasan.
halos ibinenta ako nang kapatid ko kay khal drogo sa paghahangadd na maangkin naming muli ang aming kaharian. kapalit nang pag-angking ito ang pag-angkin din sa aking katawan nang isang bandido. ipinaasawa ang aking buong pagkadonselya sa isang dothraki.
hindi ko alam kung pano sisimulan ang kwento tungkol sa aming unang pagniniig. sa unang kita ko pa lamang kay khal drogo, ang kanyang mga pintados sa katawan, nakakatakot at parang nanlilisik na mga mata, buhok na parang sa kabayo, nakakarimarim na lagkit nang kanyang pawis at amoy kabayo–sa kabayo kasi laging nakadikit ang mga dothraki, kuya xerex–hindi ko malunok ang kinasadlakan kong asawa.
noong unang gabi, sa loob nang tent namin, unti-unti nyang tinanggal ang saplot hanggang wala nang matira. sabay sa dampi ng gabi, pinagmasdan nya ang buo kong kahubdan na parang nilulunok, iniinom ang aking katorse-anyos na alindog nang dahan-dahan. parang alak na mamamahalin na inuunti-unti. maya-maya’y gumapang ang kanyang mga palad sa buong katawan ko. nang dumako sa aking dibdib. nilapirot nya ang aking utong, at pinatuwad. ganon na lamang ang pagmando nya, hanggang sa maramdaman ko ang pangigiit nang matigas nyang ari sa aking hiyas. umiyak ako sa sakit.
sa mga sumunod na gabi, puro ganitong pagmamahalang aso lamang ang gusto nya. maraming beses na ni di man lamang hintaying mabasa ang hiyas ko bago nya ako araruhin nang kanyang mga ulos. hindi ko rin alam kung bakit di siya makatingin sa aking mata habang nagtatalik.
makaraan ang ilang buwan humanga ako sa tapang at nakampante sa seguridad na bigay ni khal drogo. isang araw, hinangad ko bigla na ako naman ang kabayahuhin nya muli. pagpasok na pagpasok nya nang tent namin, tinanggal ko ang tali nang aking nakatapis na damit at hinayaang bumagsak. pagkatapos, inakay ko sya palabas. alam kong nakatingin ang ibang mga dothraki at dumagdag sa kiliti ko ang alam kong pagpapasasa nang kanilang mga mata. nang simula nya akong itulak muli patuwad, hinawakan ko ang kanyang mga kamay. “hindi, khal, hindi ngayong gabi.” humiga ako sa damuhan at hinatak sya.
noon ko lang nakita ang kanyang sandata. naghuhumindig at punung-puno ito nang ugat na nakapalibot sa malakabayong haba at taba nito, nakakatakot ang nagpupumiglas nyang dyunyor, pero kasabay nang takot ay todong pagnanasa na umaagos mula isip, puso, hanggang pababa nang hiyas ko. basang-basa akong kinubabawan nya, ipinasok si pedro nang buung-buo sa akin, at umindayog kami. hinawakan ko ang kanyang mukha, at pinilit kong magtagpo ang aming mga mata habang inaararo nya ako. el-na-el-an ako kuya xerex sa aming parang pagsasayaw nang gabing iyon. bawat ulos nya ay parang umaakyat ang buo kong pagkatao sa langit, pataas, pataas nang pataas, hanggang sa sabay kami na napaimpit na sigaw nang luwalhati, sa ilalim ng buwan.
pagka-abot namin sa rurok nang ligaya, noon ko nakita ang totoong pungay ng mga mata ni khal. at sa mga segundong iyon alam kong parang naging bata ang aking mister na kailangan din nang pag-aaruga. ang ang kanyang buong pagkatao, pawis, amoy, lagkit, semilya ay nagpapaisa sa amin. at sa mga sandali ring iyon alam kong sa kin lamang nakatutok ang kanyang buong diwa… ang kanyang pagmamahal. walang bagsik ni khal drogo pagdating sa akin. na ang tapang na pinapakita nya sa panlabas ay kinakailangan para sumunod ang kanyang ang aming mga nasasakupan.
ito na ba kuya xerex ang simula nang tinatawag na pag-ibig? ang pag-ibig na kayang sakripisyo ang lahat?
dito ko na munaa tatapusin ang aking liham, para mapaghandaan muli ang aming lambingan ngayong gabi.
good luck sa iyong kolum
lubos na gumagalang,
khaleesi dani.
August 29th, 2011 at 05:41
Extension please? :D
August 29th, 2011 at 10:56
Ok extended till Wednesday noon.
August 29th, 2011 at 18:37
Off topic: Ngayon ko na lang ulit nabasa ang nadonselya hehe :)
August 31st, 2011 at 10:20
Sam
They were all gathered around the hand that Jon had severed from the wight walker. This was definitely not a normal walker. The glove was made of exquisite velvet. It was tattered, but pretty nonetheless.
Sam looked over to the table where some of wight’s belongings were laid out. There was a rich silk under tunic and boots studded with large rubies. A cashmere pashmina was folded on top of a finely crafted chain mail made out of Valyrian steel. The armor’s neckline was set with a variety of exquisitely cut precious stones. Even from ten feet away, everyone could smell the sweet perfume coming from the wight’s garments.
Sam was growing more and more agitated. This was not a normal wight walker. It obviously had a lot of style. Fab!
Jon tore away a piece of the velvet encasing the walker’s index finger, where Ghost had sank his teeth into the night before, revealing the flesh underneath.
Mormont took a sharp intake of breath.
The flesh, drained of blood, was as white as snow but what was more shocking was the fingernail. It was manicured, the tip crimson red. What Sam initially thought to be dried blood turned out to be nail polish.
Mormont let out a resigned sigh, took out several small pieces of parchment and quietly scribbled on them.
“Take this Maester Aemon,” he motioned to Sam when he was done writing. “Tell him to send two ravens each to King’s Landing and to Highgarden, and one each of whatever else ravens we have left”.
“What’s wrong?” Jon asked, finally unable to contain his curiosity.
Before Mormont could answer, Sam glanced down at the one of the messages.
“The Zombadings are coming. Send help with haste.” he read aloud.
“Zombadings,” Mormont’s raven cried. “Zombadings!”
The air in the room suddenly grew colder as they realized what they were up against.
————–
(Not too much of a writer, but too much of a fan not to put together an attempt :p)
August 31st, 2011 at 11:39
Sam-bading?
August 31st, 2011 at 14:54
Argh! I missed that opportunity :( Now that would haunt me the rest of the day, LOL.