Noble’s new book, Medicinal Cannibalism in Early Modern English Literature and Culture, and another by Richard Sugg of England’s University of Durham, Mummies, Cannibals and Vampires: The History of Corpse Medicine from the Renaissance to the Victorians, reveal that for several hundred years, peaking in the 16th and 17th centuries, many Europeans, including royalty, priests and scientists, routinely ingested remedies containing human bones, blood and fat as medicine for everything from headaches to epilepsy. There were few vocal opponents of the practice, even though cannibalism in the newly explored Americas was reviled as a mark of savagery. Mummies were stolen from Egyptian tombs, and skulls were taken from Irish burial sites. Gravediggers robbed and sold body parts.
“The question was not, ‘Should you eat human flesh?’ but, ‘What sort of flesh should you eat?’ ” says Sugg.
Nescafe Dolce Gusto hosted a lunch at Beso in Central High Street to introduce their new coffee machine. The chef prepared a degustacion—small portions of Mediterranean dishes, each course paired with one of the Dolce Gusto coffees.
If you place a good cup of coffee in front of us we will drink it. So during the starters we were quite chatty.
Dinna mentioned cosmetics. We brought up a factoid we’d heard somewhere that Joel Cruz sold a billion pesos worth of scent last year. Yes, one billion pesos. We are clearly in the wrong line of work. Liza noted that Bench’s bestseller is scent, hence all the movie stars/celebrities launching their own perfume brands.
During the main course hilarity ensued.
We noted that Hayden Kho had his own perfume, and Dinna said it had been sold to Ever Bilena. We said how odd it was that the billboard for his perfume showed him fully-dressed when he is best remembered in a state of undress. That perfume should’ve been called Careless Whisper. (But would he have to pay licensing fees to George Michael?) Or Wham Bam Thank You Ma’am, Pia added.
By dessert we felt like walking all the way home, a bad idea as it was the height of summer.
Jiggy showed us how to use the Dolce Gusto machine. First you choose a capsule (Caffe Lungo, Espresso, Capuccino, Latte Macchiato, Mocha, Chococino or Peach tea). Then three easy steps: pop the capsule in the thingy, lock the compartment, and drop the latch. Voila, good coffee in a minute. (It is not a sushal na 3-in-1, it is a sushal na coffeemaker.)
Nescafe Dolce Gusto is available in supermarkets for Php4,999. A box of 8 capsules costs Php402.
1. Decide whether the story is taking place in the past, the present or the future, pick a tense and stick to it. Constantly switching tenses makes the reader dizzy.
This is especially important if your protagonist lives in the present day but behaves as if it were 1994.
2. Ambition is great, but so is self-awareness. Be honest about your skills level. Do not go for verbal acrobatics unless you are sure you will not land on your face.
Example. They weren’t asexual pods: in fact, they’ve had their fair share of each other’s bodies before they were even engaged. Not having a children after 2 years, it would seem, was an oddity. Or perhaps it was the fact that they have had enough of human flesh that the experience was already boring for them.
The first sentence takes too long to say they used to have sex a lot. The second sentence is windy. The third suggests they are cannibals.
3. Keep it simple. Unless you’re writing an epic fantasy or a farce set in the academe, don’t try to sound like a thesaurus.
Economy is a good thing. Some of you allude to Closer. Consider the most stinging insult in that movie.
Two words: “You. . .writer.” (The clip is in Italian but you’ll get it.)
4. Mind your grammar. When in doubt, consult the spelling and grammar checker on Word or whatever application you’re using. It takes seconds.
It is true that we do not copy-edit letters to our advice columnist. The uncorrected version gives us helpful information on the letter-writer’s state of mind, educational background, etc. If their sentence construction is off-kilter, they can claim emotional distress.
You are trying to win a prize in a contest.
5. “A painting by someone who sounds like a candy brand” only makes sense to people familiar with Goya. Don’t assume that everyone who reads your work is just like you.
6. You watch movies, how delightful. We’re all for dropping film references, but what do Ray and The Aviator have to do with the story? Do the characters have an affinity to blind musicians and germ-phobic billionaires?
7. “Maybe he love her?” Hulk not pleased. Hulk smash!
The winner of LitWit Challenge 8.8: Talk to him is jaime. Congratulations. Please post your full name in Comments and we’ll alert you when your prize has been delivered to National Bookstore in Rockwell.
The Weekly LitWit Challenge is brought to you by our friends at National Bookstore.
Arya at Gendry: Eeeeeeeeeee ang kyot nila. Ayon sa aklat, 10 taong gulang si Arya at si Gendry ay 15 pero sa dami ng pinagdaraanan nila para na silang 40. Teka, 15 yan? Pero sinabi naman sa aklat na malaking bata talaga si Gendry. At kamukha niya ang nasirang hari ng Westeros na kanyang ama.
Cersei at Jaime. Ick ick ick ick ick ick ick.
Jon at Ygritte. Oops, spoiler.
Daenerys at Khal Drogo. Huhuhuhu nguni’t sa katapusan ng ikalimang aklat tila magkaka-relasyon siya muli sa isang Dothrak. Sana kamukha uli ni Jason Momoa.
Tyrion at Shae. Hindi kami makapapayag na si Tyrion ay mapunta sa isang talipandas! Totoo ba na ang aktres na iyon ay galing sa porno?
Stannis at Melisandre. Ick ick ick ick ick ick ick
Renly at Loras. Ayyyyyyyy. Hindi patas ang labanan, may mumuu yung babaeng pula.
Robb at Jeyne. Na sa serye sa telebisyon ay nagngangalang Talisa (o may ibang Jeyne ba talaga?) Layuan mo siya Robb! Ipinangako ka ng iyong ina sa mga Frey at kung hindi matuloy ang kasal…
Joffrey at Sansa. Lintik na tiyanak ka, mamatay ka! Mamatay kaaaaaaa!
Daenerys at Jorah Mormont. Hija, ikaw lang ba ang hindi nakakapansin, o deadma ka lang?
Margaery at ang kanyang mga malas na mapapangasawa. Diba 15 lang si Margaery Tyrell sa mga aklat? Bakit si Anne Boleyn yan?
Littlefinger at Varys. Uuuuuuuyyyyyyyy. Wala, nang-iintriga lang.
Sam at Gilly. Sweet. Si Samwell ba ay hommage kay Samwise Gamgee?
Theon at Ikaw. Naku, tsk tsk tsk tsk.
Jon Snow at Robb Stark.
– Ano ba, incest na naman!
– Hinde, dahil baka si Jon ay hindi anak ni Eddard Stark kundi ng kanyang kapatid na si Lyanna at ni Rhaegar Targaryen.
– Che! Bakla! Inyo na nga si Renly at Loras e.
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