The farce be with you.
I did not think it possible, but it’s happened: the Metro Manila Film Festival has plumbed new depths of ludicrousness. I’m not wasting two hours of my life on any movie in this year’s lineup, not even for the purpose of mocking it. At least last year we could entertain ourselves by writing bad verse about bad movies; this year I don’t have to see them to know that they suck.
Okay, I admit I considered watching Ligalig for Cesar Montano’s philosophical ruminations, or Tatlong Baraha, because who can resist the sight of grown men in Zorro costumes battling villainous clowns on the roof of a building? (I saw the trailer.) Then you remember that these sword-wielding Halloween refugees are elected public officials, ay caramba.
Celia Rodriguez’s remarks at the filmfest awards night provided a fitting ending to this pathetic story. According to the papers she said, “Siempre maganda tayo kasi hindi tayo nanggagapang ng awards,” or words to that effect. I think she’s sensational. Ms. Rodriguez of course is best known to my generation as Valentina, the snake-haired arch-villain in the Darna movie. As a kid I preferred Valentina to Darna because she was more articulate, had a better wardrobe (with the gold turban to cover the writhing snakes on her head), and unlike the superheroine, she did not have to be a mousy wimp when she was off-duty, she was fabulous all the time. I met Ms. Rodriguez a few years ago through the director Jeffrey Jeturian, and she told us hilarious stories about working with the maestro Gerry De Leon, her supposed feud with Ms. Rita Gomez, and modelling for Emilio Pucci in Milan. She also shared this interesting factoid: the full name of Valentina is Doctor Valentina Vrandakapoor, Ph.D. in Reptilian Zoology from the University of New Delhi.
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
January 3rd, 2007 at 01:08
I heard that GMA got a lifetime achievement award at the filmfest awards night. I suppose it was for a lifetime of looking like Nora Aunor.
January 3rd, 2007 at 13:18
I agree: you don’t need to watch them to know that they suck. But I watched one entry (I was forced). Shake, Rattle and Roll. I had a headache afterwards.
January 3rd, 2007 at 19:08
i watched zsazsa zaturnah because of zsazsa padilla and partly because of the concept. she wasn’t disappointing, the movie entertained me as well.
January 4th, 2007 at 12:22
I saw KKK and thought it was smart and really funny. Gina Pareno is THE BOMB.
January 4th, 2007 at 12:43
No horror flick ticks my hackles off quicker than a horror flick that consciously scares the hell out of you. I am not saying that brilliant films are helmed by spaced-out directors but it’s just downright frustrating to watch something that you know was made to scare you. You see, there is a difference between scariness as a state of being and scaring as a conscious act. Think of Chaka Doll with a placard that shouts out – “THERE BE HORROR HERE. SCREAM!” Joey Reyes was just duh with his entry in Matakot Ka Sa Karma. Everything sucks — wobbly plotlines, shoddy effects, stilted dialogues, the whole nine yards that any self-respecting director should strain his eyes away from if at all he is serious with his efforts to salvage a folly-fallen film industry. Heavens! Take away Gretchen B’s ridiculous eyepencil-thin brows and those tiresome moviemaking mannerisms then leave Anna Capri smack right in the middle, you have got a good showcase of fine Filipino craftmanship. Makarma sana silang mga gumagawa ng mga ganitong klase ng pelikula!
January 6th, 2007 at 16:26
One of the MMFF criteria for judging best picture was “earning power” = “commercial viability.”
criteria for judging:
40% “commercial viability”
40% artistic and technical excellence, and global appeal, another 40 percent
20% Filipino cultural values
no wonder nanalo ang “Enteng Kabisote 3” ng best picture this year. LOL.