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My problem is with my niece. It’s not a problem really, but a confusing situation. My niece is in her third year of high school and seriously wants to be a writer. It’s partly my fault since I was the one who introduced her to very well-written work. She is convinced that writers make enough money to afford a flat (or condo) in Makati, eat out at restaurants, and watch movies most of the time. I want to dissuade her since most of the creative writers I know hardly make enough to cover rent and can’t even buy themselves cars.

Her parents are annoyed at me since they want their smart and talented daughter to become a lawyer. They are snubbing me at family gatherings and have been spreading talk in our clan about what a bad influence I am on their daughter. Now that really smarts, since all I have been guilty of is admiring well-written work.

Could you kindly enlighten me on how to approach this situation?

When I was young(er), I wanted to become a priest, then a teacher, then an archeologist, then a paleontologist, then a news reporter, then a marketing executive, then a philosopher, then a theater actor, and then a stockbroker. I turned out to be none of the above.

When I got accepted into college, I literally had no idea what course to take because the school I went to had long phased out the degree I listed in my application. I decided to take up what I thought sounded interesting based on the course description written on the acceptance letter. When I was in fourth year, I realized that I did not like my course but I had no choice but to graduate. A month after graduation, I managed to sweet-talk my mother into sending me to a graduate school in another part of the country. It was really just a ploy to continue receiving a monthly allowance while living in another city as I tried to figure out what to do with my life.

The first three years of half-heartedly pursuing my second degree was, to date, the darkest period of my life. There is nothing worse than enduring hardship when your heart is not into it. It was when I was about to graduate that I realized that I somewhat liked my second degree, and exerted efforts to graduate on time.

I envy your niece. At a young age she has already decided what she wants to be. I presume this is not just a phase for her parents are against it and they have gone to the extent of telling other people that you have ruined their daughter.

I have found that people who do things that they really enjoy are very successful. Once you know what you want, you just think about how to get it and everything else will just follow, including success and money. People who enjoy their work do not think about money, but it finds its way into their bank accounts. A fitness trainer I know probably earns almost as much as I do. He did not even finish college but he earns more than the average college graduate. He is really into fitness training and enjoys helping his clients. People who are successful in their fields have passion and guts. Without passion and guts, you won’t get anywhere even if you are a lawyer or whatever.

Whether your niece follows her parents’ wishes is not your concern. You weren’t the snake who tempted her with the forbidden fruit were you? Do not apologize for being who you are and sharing your interests. Hindi ka naman nagda-drugs. Your niece has a mind of her own, as teenagers often do. Let her figure it out. It’s her life after all. If she wants to be a writer, let her go through the difficulties and challenges of pursuing her dreams. That way she will have something to draw from and write about.

As for her parents snubbing you at gatherings, I suggest you snub them too. Why should you be sorry for something that you did not do? When was it ever a sin to read, enjoy and share well-written work? Oh, there was a time in history when people got burnt at the stake for it. . .You are a witch!