Marxist Philosophy, Groucho edition
A child of five would understand this. Fetch me a child of five.
I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
Room service? Send up a larger room.
Marriage is a wonderful institution but who wants to live in an institution?
Military justice is to justice as military music is to music.
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got into my pyjamas I’ll never know.
Those are my principles and if you don’t like them, I have others.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
You can quote me as saying I was misquoted.
Answers to questions you might be asking, unless you wandered onto this site purely by accident >>>
August 31st, 2009 at 07:08
Hi Jessica,
How about these:
“You have the brain of a four year old child – and I’ll bet he was glad to get rid of it.”
“I’d horsewhip you if I had a horse.”
Then of course, there is his zinger to the woman with numerous children who appeared on You Bet Your Life – which got him banned from going to air live and without a time-delay (After asking why she had so many children, she said: “Well, I love my husband.” To which he instantly replied “Well, I love my cigar, but even I take it out sometimes”.
Gotta love Groucho.
Cheers.