JessicaRulestheUniverse.com

I’m a big fan of Pilot writing instrument—started using the V5 sign pen 15 years ago, and these days I always carry at least three Pilot VBall 0.5 pens. Today at the Pilot counter I saw this:

A Pilot Frixion pen with eraseable ink! Just rub the plastic tip against the writing and it vanishes.

The Pilot Frixion 0.7 retails for P77.00.

This is the perfect present for politicians who like to disavow any knowledge of their own deeds. It’s easier to erase a signature than a witness.

By the way, thanks to the Commission on Elections for enlightening us as to the real qualification for elective office: Money. Not principles or ideas or an actual program of action, just money. Well, “winnability”. Which is another way of saying, “Money!” Now we are rid of our silly illusions.

Saffy and Mat have already had their shots, thank you.

Not take them to the veterinarian, though some of the prospective candidates for the 2010 presidential elections sound like they could use a rabies shot. I mean put them through a critical examination: who are they, what have they got to offer, why are they running for president, why should we believe them, and other questions that are strangely left out of their campaign ads. Let’s start with their campaign ads. What are they saying, do you buy it, would you vote for them? And if you want to discuss production values and efficiency at delivering the message, I can’t stop you.

Critiques! We want critiques! If possible, please include a link to the political ad you are discussing. Yes, I am making you write my blog for me. Yes, we’d be happy to invite you to the think tank thingy. You will need plenty of caffeine to overcome the ill effects of exposure to political ads.

Something amaaazing has happened. It’s one of those choices that are so obvious and right, we can’t believe it was actually made.

US President-elect Obama has named Steven Chu his Energy Secretary. He picked an expert for the job.

Chu is the head of the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory. He won the Nobel Prize in Physics in 1997 for his work on supercooled atoms. He has pushed for research on solar energy and biofuels. He advocates controlling greenhouse emissions. And he’s an employee of the US Department of Energy!

Critics note that Chu is not a politician, so he might not survive Washington. What, you think someone can run a government laboratory without political skills?

Given that amaaazing things are happening, let’s allow ourselves to think that someone with all the necessary qualifications plus a well-developed conscience can become the next President of the Philippines. (Naturally we are assuming that the 2010 elections will go on as scheduled.) Who would you nominate for President of the Philippines? Someone qualified and viable—we’ll worry about “winnability” later. Yes, you love Manny Pacquiao, but he’s done enough for this country. No, seriously, you can’t nominate Pac-Man. Name your candidates.

Look at the nominations so far. Hope ticket, or Despair ticket?

Since the Americans are so pleased with themselves for making the choice that was obvious to everyone else in the world (and we congratulate them), here’s something that could help kick-start the US economy: the Obama industry. Sales of President-elect Barack Obama’s books and audiobooks, books about Obama, election memorabilia, T-shirts, mugs, and pins with Barack’s face on them, could keep retailers afloat in these hard times.

Photo: Display at Fully Booked, Bonifacio High St. (“High Street” doesn’t sound right next to the name of the leader of the Philippine Revolution, so I will call it “Bonifacio Heist”.)

From our crush soon to be at the White House (Are they there yet? Are they there yet?)

Thanks to The Bone for the sketch.

Duke slain! Atreides heir lost, presumed dead.

Photo: Dunes, Paoay
 

The winners of our Alternate History headline-writing contest are:

“Elected, Shocked, Dead.

“Surprised by own victory, McCain suffers heart attack.” by Juan.

“NO-BAMA!” by Cacs.

“No, we can’t” by wengkisantos.

Honorable mention: “Garci in DC” by walterrobles.

Juan, Cacs, wengkisantos, please post your mailing addresses in the Philippines. 

Thanks to everyone who sent in their entries. We were supposed to pick just one winner, but what the hell.